The True Scott Hall is Revealed!

Today's villain is Scott "Hoodwink" Hall. Scott is being sued for harassing a scantily clad waitress at the local Hooters bar and restaurant. "I've been yelled at, pinched, and sexually harassed, but never .. and I mean never ... have I had someone wink so sleazily at me before. They need to lock this guy up for a long time," said Hooters employee Missy B. Haven. Click here to see photos of Missy B. Haven.

Penny isn't as innocent as you'd think!

Today's villain is Penny "For Your Thoughts" Holcomb. Penny has been closely linked to a vigilantly deer slaughtering ring that is drastically reducing the deer population in northern Minnesota. Sources close to the DNR and Minnesota Deer Hunter's Association have tagged Holcomb as the leader of this reckless group. "This type of activity is illegal, unethical and will not be tolerated," said DNR Conservation Officer John Doe. Reports show that people with old cars and empty freezers are leading this carnage. Click here to see proof.

Mom arrested for signage!

Today's villain is Jennifer Poenix. Jennifer was handcuffed and escorted out of KAXE's studio this afternoon by FBI (Federal Bureau of Investigation) agents. Sources close to the Northern Observer heard from a confidential informer that Jennifer was arrested for defacing government property. It seems as though Jennifer has hired a group of graffiti thugs to deface all the Phoenix , Arizona signs changing them to read Poenix. This self-indulging act could get Jennifer 10-15 years in the Phoenix Correctional Facility. Click here to see the damage.

I'd like to waste your time...

Mr. MacRostie's Simply Doug convenience store in Spring Lake, Minnesota received a citation this morning for being inconvenient. So many complaints had surfaced over the past few months that authorities had to step in to ensure convenience. "It was so incredibly inconvenient to stop there I had to call the cops," said Stan Hurrie. MacRostie was unavailable for comment For your convenience .. click here.

Mark Thompson or Richard Tarner

Mark was taken into custody Monday morning for impersonating singer Richard Thompson. Tarner has left a long trail of deception from writing bad checks, charging for autographs, and getting free soup at restaurants from Galway to Graceland. Click here to see live video from Mark's jail cell..

Holtan arrested!

Today's villain is Heidi Holtan. Heidi was arrested Friday afternoon by conservation officer Jack backer for aiding and abetting in the deaths of many small birds in Grand Rapids. A search warrant served at the Holtan/Cobb residence revealed many books on the subject of teaching your cat how to kill song birds. "This is preposterous! My cat Sweetie would never do anything like that let alone me," said Holtan. Click here to see excerpts from Heidi's "How To Teach Your Cat To Kill Song Birds" book.

Houg Admits He Loves the Ladies!

Today's villain is Dan Houg. Dan is in big trouble today after allegedly stealing nearly 400 issues of a new glossy woman's magazine that recently hit the news stands.

Houg was quoted as saying, "It really reflects the honesty of women and I for one applaud it! Women in Northern Minnesota are not only hardworking and talented, they are good-looking, except when they wear baseball hats! To be a devil's advocate, what if these women's magazines got in the hands of the wrong people? Plus, I'm researching a glossy-magazine burning vehicle."

Law enforcement agencies in four different counties in Northern Minnesota have placed an all-point-bulletin for the arrest of a man fitting the description of KAXE's engineer Dan Houg. If you have any information as to the whereabouts of Dan "Little Woman" Houg, please call (218) 326-1234. Click here to see sketch artist photos on Dan Houg

Is a Rose still a Rose???

Stephanie Rose was arrested late last night after a three month sting investigation revealed that Stephanie is the leader of a nationwide group of blondes who sell counterfeit Coach Bags around the world. "A search warrant to Stephanie's home/office overturned 91 bags and leather stamping tools with the word Coach on the them," said investigating officer Straps. Click here to see crime scene photos

Midlife Crisis causes drama at Farmers Market!!!

After turning 50 earlier this year, John Bauer attempted to reclaim his youth by reliving his teenage shoplifting days. Bauer was arrested this morning by police for lifting a pumpkin at a local famers market. Bauer says, “I was just trying to find one big enough to fit over my head…but I forgot my wallet.” Witnesses say Bauer crammed the large squash onto his head and tried to flee the scene, but was thwarted when he blindly ran into a display of beets and turnips – where he was left lying until police arrived.

KAXE member Glen Campbell arrested!

25+ year KAXE member Glen Campbell was recently arrested in Mission Township, Crow Wing County.

"What's so wrong with making sure everyone listens to KAXE? I AM the lineman of the county! Wichita, Crow Wing.... what's the diff?" said Campbell.

Campbell was arrested after breaking and entering approximately 30 homes. Campbell did not steal any personal property, spending only five minutes in each home.

"I had to tune the dial to 91.7fm KAXE! It took me a little longer because of the fringe issue. Some of the homes were picking up 89.9fm KAXE. Chad Brandt rocks the airwaves!" said Campbell.

Authorities released Campbell on his own recognizance.

Latimer Arrested!

John was arrested yesterday afternoon from his mail route for falsifying Phenology notes for the past 25 years. "In a way, I'm kind of relieved. This is something I've been carrying around for a long time. I'd like to apologize to all those Phenologists out there who I have let down," said Latimer. "I do like watching reality TV that involves nature, that's close enough, isn't it?"

KAXE General Manager Steals Award Winning Carrot!

While the artistry of photographers like Richard Avedon and Annie Leibovitz provides the images of the powerful that will go down in history, KAXE actually prefers the work of some more obscure shutterbugs. We’re talking about the countless clerks, cops, and sheriff's deputies who handle the impromtu photo shoots with the radio personalities who’ve landed in the pokey. Without the aid of fancy lighting, makeup, and wardrobe, these little works of mug shot art--taken with digital cameras at law enforcement agencies nationwide--are perhaps the most candid photos you’ll see. Today's culprit is KAXE's General manager Maggie Montgomery. Maggie was taken into custody for stealing an award-winning carrot from her neighbor and taking credit for its authenticity.