
After turning 50 earlier this year, John Bauer attempted to reclaim his youth by reliving his teenage shoplifting days. Bauer was arrested this morning by police for lifting a pumpkin at a local famers market. Bauer says, “I was just trying to find one big enough to fit over my head…but I forgot my wallet.” Witnesses say Bauer crammed the large squash onto his head and tried to flee the scene, but was thwarted when he blindly ran into a display of beets and turnips – where he was left lying until police arrived.










